Dec 22, 2011

The Breakup: When is it time to say "Good Bye" to your stylist?

When you become natural, sometimes it means parting ways with your hairstylist. This breakup can be difficult. Stylists can become good friends. Good friends can become stylists. But when you transition to natural hair, more often than not, your hair stylist will become less critical to your hair health.

I transitioned with the crucial help of a hair stylist. Once I did my big medium chop, it became obvious that my stylist was beginning to hinder rather than help my natural hair journey. She was my friend before she was my stylist. Long story short, I lost her as both... AND my coils became a fried mess. I had to recover from this:

March 2011. This was the cause of my break up.
It wasn't because my stylist was out to ruin my hair life. It was because she was ignorant about my "new" hair and felt that she could do anything to it because my especially coarse hair can take it. Here are some warning signs to leave your stylist before you have a hair tragedy like mine:
  • Your stylist is not certified to do natural hair. Self-explanatory.
  • Your stylist is rough with your hair. If you constantly leave the chair with a sore scalp, and see too much hair in the sink, then something is wrong. This is a sign that your stylist doesn't recognize that even "coarse" hair must be handled with care.
  • Your stylist cites the texture of your hair as the reason for his or her inability to manage your hair, and argues ALL of your advice on handling your hair.
  • Your stylist has offered more than once to "fix" your hair with a texturizer or relaxer. If they are not fond of caring for your natural hair, do not force them with continued patronage.
If this describes your stylist, I suggest that you find a new hair stylist for your natural hair. There's no reason to keep leavng the salon with a bad feeling. You should feel pampered and happy.
Do not feel obligated to someone who is not willing to learn about your hair. Summon your courage for an “It’s not you; it’s me.” conversation; or an “It’s definitely you,”conversation. Gradually stop making appointments or quit cold turkey. However you finish the relationship with a stylist who's just not working out anymore, just finish it. If you're not happy with the service and skill level, you will find your hair journey easier without the dead weight of an unwanted stylist.

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